My husband’s birthday is on the Ides of March. I’m always happy that his birthday is a week after mine. I joke that it helps me set figure out what to get him as he sets the scale on my birthday which is exactly a week before.
This year I’m distracted. We have started my Mom on hospice. Her heart issue has started to present some symptoms and I was rather direct with the cardiologist that since we knew what the out come was to be, I wanted to be sure she didn’t hurt. Enter hospice. I’m hoping it will help as an extra set of eyes on my Mom. It is hard to tell from a day to day standpoint, what is going on with her. These days I see her weekly but I feel that isn’t enough. I hate having to hire someone just to have eyes on her, but if we are lucky and find the right person, maybe it will work out. Who knows.
Meanwhile my Aunt with Alzheimer’s continues to linger. Surviving on Ensure and Oreos. She sleeps most of the day and God knows why she is still with us. Her mind is certainly ready, but her body hasn’t given up yet.
On a completely separate note, I ran into someone I went to high school with and with whom I worked at ILM. While I was laid off some 20 years ago she continued with them and is an Executive Producer. She has been very successful and admittedly I’m a bit jealous. I am happy for her. I know she worked very hard to get where she is. She went through a lot and has a lovely family of her own now. We ran into each other visiting our parents at their retirement facility. Had a lovely albeit brief chat. Of course it got me thinking for my 45 minute ride home. I feel there is so much more for me to accomplish in this life, but don’t know how best to go about executing that.
Getting older I now look back and do on occasion wonder what if… Usually it would require me to have worked a lot harder and now, in many ways, I’m not sure how to go back and learn something to make me more successful or useful or just more interesting? I dunno. I’m grateful for the many friends I have who are truly supportive, but feel I need to do something else. I suspect I need to do some work around that.