In our current news cycle, I can’t keep up. I’ve been burning through my free Washington Post and New York Times online passes. I’ve even been burning through my data minutes on my phone while I interview or go out to training or meeting to network. So much information in the world with what seems to be very little results. Machines grind forward doing business or government as usual. My little cog self, being ground up in the process. I’m finally getting better at networking but short of having some brilliant piece of writing go viral, I’m just hammering away at the system. The process of looking for work, of being a parent, of trying to stay engaged and learn new things, of staying on top of the news cycle, of helping my aged aunt and mom. The machine seems so large today. I try to participate. I try to make a difference in my own way, but so much seems futile.
But then a friend will say “thank you for your post” or “thank you for talking to me” or “thank you for sharing your experience”. I’m chipping away at the machine in my own way. I wish my “successes” were greater some days. I wish they were more macro successes and not just micro. But whatever the size they are successes.
It reminds me of It’s a Wonderful Life. The movie where George Bailey gets to experience what the world would have been like had he not been there to save his brother, to marry Mary, to keep the Building and Loan going. It would be nice to have an angel grant all of us that sort of wish, but for now, I have to remember to just look at the eyes of friends who remind me why it is good I’m still here. To know my Aunt and Mom are safe in Assisted Living. That my daughter exists. That maybe a word of kindness was what helped another today. That sharing a silly story made someone laugh instead of cry. I have to remember to say thank you too. Thank you to those that say something. We all have our struggles and now more than ever it is time to share our kindness and keep building on it. Keep growing. Move forward. Hopefully one day soon, I can give someone else a free pass.