Sometimes it feels hard to be Thankful.

Thanksgiving is actually one of my favorite holidays.  Mostly because I get to hang out with family, eat, and not have to worry about gifts.  Halloween is a bit overstimulating for me and Christmas, well, it has become so commercial.  It is hard to get on board with not giving gifts at all.  Especially when you have kids.  Thanksgiving though is eating and talking, and enjoying each other’s company.

Now I won’t lie.  Last year was a bit rough.  It was right after the election.  We had gone back East to visit family and let’s just say, we weren’t on the same page.  Fortunately, we got the big argument out of the way via Skype before Thanksgiving.  We also had snow which for this native Californian and my daughter, was pretty cool.  This year we are staying put and the family we are hanging with are more like-minded politically.  Still, it feels a bit harder this year to be Thankful.

We have seen hurricanes, earthquakes, fires and multiple mass shootings.  It seems sexual harassment has finally made the front page in Hollywood. The rich are getting richer and the poor seem to be getting poorer thanks to some of the rich.  Those of us in the middle are just trying to hang on.  I’m still not working though I’d like to.  Unemployment is low, but that doesn’t mean people aren’t still struggling to make ends meet.

I’ve had friends who have lost people close to them because of illness, addiction, or suicide.  People are struggling and we don’t have leaders who help build us up and together but rather name call and tear us apart.  I’m not saying the past has been perfect, but between Mother Nature, technology, and the current political climate, it feels like life is just a bit meaner.  A bit harder.

But I’m not one who likes to dwell on the negative even when it feels like it is swirling around me.  I try very hard to look for the good.  After all, I’m raising a child in this world today and it is important to me that she sees the good and the hope.  I seem to find this mostly close to home in my family and neighborhood.  The guy at the grocery store who goes to grab something at the same time as me but then gives it to me.  The person who greets my Aunt with Alzheimer’s when we are at church, even though I’m in a rush to get her back home.  The kid who comes over for a playdate with my daughter and lets her go first on what to play at.  The friend who thinks of me when a possible job opportunity arises.  Heck, even the woman at the stop sign who waves me to turn first even though she got there first.  When I look at these, I remember that we are all trying to do our best with what we have.

The holidays can get crazy.  It often feels like we are being pulled in too many directions.  I find it really important though to slow down and be grateful for the ordinary, the day to day.  The husband who actually cleans the shower for me among many other things that I don’t always say thank you for.

Life is what we make it.  Maybe from the little things, we can grow to be grateful and teach those around us how to be grateful too.  Maybe that will cascade to the rest of the world.  Maybe.  But we won’t know unless we try.

Today didn’t go as planned…

Today didn’t go as expected.  I got up, that was normal.  I had breakfast, that was normal too.  I took my daughter to school.  Still normal.  Then I tried to leave her school.  My car wouldn’t start.  Now I’ll tell you, if you are going to have a car not start, the best place for that to happen is at home.  The second best place though is your kid’s school.  Particularly when it is a small Catholic school.  I was calling AAA which was warning me via a recording that there were unusually long wait times but to hold on.  Meanwhile, a few Mom’s go by. Then I see the recently retired fire captain.  There is a man who will have jumper cables.  I kindly ask him if he could give my car a jump after dropping the kids off.  He obliges.  Multiple people ask if I need assistance but I tell them I’m good.  Another Dad says he has jumper cables too.  Awesome.  I wait.

The retired fire captain is taking his mother-in-law to the doctor.  I recently had the pleasure of washing dishes with her while getting our school gym set up for our annual father/daughter dance.  Now I feel bad about delaying getting her to the doctor but she is kind enough to tell me not to worry.  “They always take 3-4 hours when they say they will be two anyway,” she reassures me.

The fire captain comes back and digs through his car.  No cables.  Seems it recently got rearranged and now he is truly perplexed.  “Not to worry,” I say. “Dad #2 has cables. I’ll just wait for him.”  Well, I don’t wait long because the fire captain goes and tracks him down for me.  Dad #2 was volunteering today and I didn’t even realize it.  I would have been waiting awhile.

Cables in hand, then attached to the vehicle, I try again.  Still no luck.  A few more times and now I have the suggestion that it must be the starter.  I thank everyone for their help and get back on the phone to AAA.  45 minutes to an hour later they show up.  Once again they try to jump my car but this time it works.  In the meantime I’ve called my mechanic explaining the issue and saying, I’ll be by in an hour.  I thank the AAA guy and head off toward my mechanic.

I drive 10-11 minutes and think before parking that I probably should leave the car running just to make sure the charge holds.  So of course I forget and turn it off.  I try to turn the car on again and back to the clicking without starting.

I’m fortunate.  I have a very kind and ethical mechanic, which in my mind is more valuable than gold.  I tell him the issue and he has one of his guys run a check on the battery and alternator.  I hang out for about 15 minutes and seems everything comes back as normal.  What do I want to do? They ask.

Considering I can’t do much without the car, I ask them to check it out.  There are a few customers before me but they say they can go over it and call me on my cell.  It will probably be a couple of hours.  They offer me a ride, but after a brief discussion, I decide to walk into the nearby town and catch a movie.

When I come out, I grab a quick bite for lunch as it is now 1:00 PM.  I decide to head back to see how the car is coming and get a call from the garage as I’m walking.  They went over all the connectors, checked and cleaned them and nothing seems to be amiss.  “OK,” says I, “I’ll be right there.”

When I get back to the garage they tell me what they did.  I ask if there is something I did to the car.  No one knows.  They charge me a fair fee for the amount of labor to clean up the inside connectors and I drive home.

My mind, of course, goes two ways.  First is:

What an inconvenience!  I missed my workout. I could have done so much this morning and of course, I stress ate pizza!

But the louder voice goes:

Boy, I apparently wasn’t supposed to have my morning go as planned today.  At least I got my daughter to school.  If I’m ever going to break down somewhere, I definitely was in the safest spot surrounded by people who know me.  I had at least 10 people offer to help.  Heck, I can take the later class at the gym and my daughter can work on her homework while I do.  I probably shouldn’t have had a slice of pizza for lunch, but in the grand scheme of things, at least I had a nice break with the movie.

Yeah, today didn’t go quite as planned, but then maybe my plan wasn’t the one that was supposed to be followed today.  We can’t control everything in life, so better to look for the good.  Today, I found a lot of good during my inconvenience.