I had been planning to update the blog here over a month ago with the story of how we almost missed our plane from Heathrow to SFO, and perhaps I will at some point, but for now I’m moving forward. While our trip was definitely the highlight of the year, there has been a bit more death than I care to experience in one year, even if it has been for those who have lead long lives.
My aunt, who is actually my Dad’s first cousin, passed on the 7th of November. She had been the last relative living on my Dad’s side of the family. My “aunt” was a twin. She and her sister had lived together their entire life and never married. Her sister had passed in 2022 and her older sister, who did marry but never had children, passed in 1999. I had moved her from her condo in Tiburon in 2014 as she had started to forget things and gotten lost a couple of times driving. We had set up her finances so I could oversee everything and in turn would inherit anything left over when she passed. In the last few years she had lived in a board and care and I tried to visit at least monthly. She had Alzheimer’s though so our conversations tended to be a bit repetitive. She actually lived for the last two years on cookies and Ensure. She had kept to her bed these last few months and in the first week of November stopped eating and drinking. She was done. She had mentally been ready for some time, but it took awhile for her body to catch up.
My brother came up for the funeral for which I was grateful. It was literally just myself, my husband and daughter and my brother who attended. An unrelated cousin showed up unexpectedly at the last minute and there was a care giver there as well. It was very small.
I now have an aunt, my mother’s younger sister, who has been diagnosed with the same heart issue my Mom had. I suspect she won’t be around much longer though we celebrated her 96th birthday recently. I’m grateful at least when her time comes I don’t have to plan it. That will be up to my cousins. I’d prefer not to have to plan any more funerals for quite some time.
It has just put me in a bit of a funk. The passage of time and all. I realize it is probably better than the option, but after the years of covid and now the passing of family, the last few years have been a bit much. I’m an introvert and do enjoy my time alone. I’m not one for big gatherings but all of this illness and change for the last few years has been hard. I’m grateful my aunt is back with her sisters. Her life these many past years has been lonely and that was heartbreaking to be an observer of though, I did my best to add a little light. I just really want to spend time now with those closest to me.
This week we are off to Santa Monica to spend time with my brother and his family for Thanksgiving. For many years now we have hosted and everyone would come to our house. But now with Mom gone, we can visit elsewhere, which is a nice change.
There are other things that percolate in the background that may come forward in the coming months. We shall see. Meanwhile Happy Thanksgiving to all.